10 secrets to making relationships last

After four failed marriages between the pair, Maia and Bart Berens were determined to make their third union a good one. Twenty-seven years later and they are not only together but dishing to us on what makes it work. In celebration of their 25th anniversary, they’ve agreed to write a series for HMG readers — sharing intimate moments, including real love letters for him and love letters for her.

“There are some very specials things we’ve noticed after all these years and we want to help people learn them so they can wake up one day and notice how many years have gone by and they still have the relationship of your dreams,” explained Maia.

Maia spent years studying relationships and coaching couples on how to make it work. In this series she introduces each secret to their long, happy relationship that she’s has noticed — with special appearances via Bart’s comments and real love letters that they have written each other over the years and some really simple relationship tips.

Here are their 10 secrets to making relationships last. Click on each one for further advice and how you can make it work.

Secret #1. Be real and feel good enough about yourself to be real.

Secret #2. Seal commitment to the relationship, not each other works way better.

Secret #3. Don’t expect your partner to do anything you are unwilling to do like forgiving and giving up being right.

Secret #4. Learn the importance of communication, honesty.

Secret #5. Remember that love includes compassion and non-judgment.

Secret #6. Be aware when the connection is dying and do something about it.

Secret #7. Let them know they’re doing a good job.

Secret #8. Own up when you’ve messed up – and learn from it.

Secret #9. Get that a good relationship is sacred, make time for it.

Secret #10. Own the whole job – take full responsibility.

Bonus #1. Love letter sample: absolutely important rules.

Bonus #2. Relationship advice for women and men.